One year ago. . .

Lans just got this email from your mom. . .

Hi Becca: It was 1 year ago today that Ilana was diagnosed. Little did we know then that we were in for the roller coaster ride of our life. That afternoon when Ilana, Ben and I all heard the word "lymphoma" for the first time in her doctor's office we were all taken back. We didn't know what to say. That was the last thing we thought she had. After our initial shock and sharing the news with the family, somehow we regrouped and took on the attitude that we were going to beat this dreaded disease. If it wasn't for the amazing support we have had from both families I'm not sure if we could of stayed so positive through the ups and downs. Over this last year on days when Ilana felt good we had such great times just being together. It didn't matter whether it was having a cup of coffee together in the morning or taking the boys to the park. Even silly things like catching an episode of Oprah or Dr. Phil, I didn't mind it because Ilana made it fun. She loved doing the everyday things the most. Even doing laundry grocery shopping was fun when she was there.
Looking back at this last year, I don't know how we could of gotten through if it wasn't for the amazing support we had from Ben and his family and all of Ilana's family and friends. I can't find the words to describe the impact of the wonderful love and support that everyone gave so graciously and freely. I will never forget that as long as I live.
I know Ilana is up there in heaven looking over us everyday. I feel her presence everywhere I go. I can still hear her fabulous laugh and see that beautiful smile.

I was holding Andrew when my mom called me sobbing with the news one year ago . . . what a hard day. And it's hard looking back knowing our worst fears came true. But what a blessing that year was to us. So thankful we got to talk to you almost every day and visit with you so much. . . to show you we would do whatever it takes and that we would love you forever.