Birthday pictures: Flashback 2011

Sweet Lans,  my laptop power cord broke almost two years ago and I have been using my PC exclusively since then.  With a wonderful birthday party for Matthew by Marina at your parents house I was reminded that I had pictures from Matthew's 2nd birthday party(pictures to come on that awesome party and more from your Aunty as well) on my laptop and just recently ordered a new charge cord so I could get these pictures.  I feel like I won the lottery looking at this lost treasure. 

I just wanted to note that on Matthew's 2nd birthday we thought you were cancer free.  But your immune system was down and your temperature was up so the doctor gave you strict orders to go to the hospital. You went for almost 10 days over Matthew's birthday.  I don't remember you upset about much but you were MAD not to be there for Matthew on his actual birthday even though we told you he was just two and didn't even know. 

The second you busted out of the hospital you hosted a party for him.  You were so excited to do this for your sweet boy.  

 Daddy and the birthday boy - my goodness the bond between them was so unbelievable then!

 Mama face!!!

Soul sisters. .

 I sure wish I had a picture with you and your daddy, but at this point we thought we would have a lifetime with you. . .I love your mama and dad.

Your parents got Matthew this giant teddy bear.  You COULD NOT WAIT to give it to him!   His reaction did not disappoint!  He went bananas for it and you just laughed with delight over his happiness!

 My goodness I miss that face!!!! 

Old pics

I found a few pics of you that made me happy... And a little teary to stumble across.  I miss ya sis!  

This is with you and Rach just days after my little Lauren was born an you lived in our apartment complex.  What a fun three years that was living next door to you!  You were so sweet with Lauren, you bought her "baby's first Christmas"  pajamas - you were pretty much baby hungry from that point on.  You wanted to be a mom sooo badly, and you LOVED your boys even though you had to wait another 6 years until Matthew was born.

This was when Rach and I had our double wedding.  You weren't officially a Smith yet, but we threw you in the family pictures because we wanted you to be.  You looked gorgeous with your spiky hair and in that classic navy suit. . .

This was when we visited mom and dad in Lake Powell. . Truthfully I can't remember what the occasion was. I think it was Thanksgiving when Jonny got married.  So beautiful - you and the landscaping.  :)

Life with boys

Marina sent me this cute exchange a while ago!

"Matthew is helping Andrew put his socks on.  Yesterday morning conversation between me and Matthew:
Me: Matthew, go and put your socks on! Matthew:  No mom, I can't!  Me: Why?  Matthew: I have to eat my breakfast, I don't want my socks to  get dirty, I can't go to my daycare in dirty socks!
Me: :/. . hmmm, and how is eating your breakfast make your socks dirty?  Matthew:  I don't really know, but it will! . . . . . . Owh, wow, go figure this one out :p"

That crazy little man. . .

"Cute Andrew in the sink. .. . no wonder he was so quiet! hahaha!  Crazy boy!!" She said they were potty training and that his little bum in those undies was adorable.   I haven't asked to see how that's all going, but knowing Marina he's probably got it down pat!

New Day Care

Marina was kind enough to send me pictures of the boys at their daycare.

"Hi, a little update on the boys!!  They started a new daycare, they absolutely love it.  Lisa is an amazing lady and boys are having so much fun. Ben and I love her, she is incredible with the boys and it makes me very happy to see that."

Yeah!  Lisa was highly recommended by a friend and has not disappointed at all.  Ben and Marina had their schedules arranged up until recently so that one of them could be home with the premie!  But now even little Nathan has started and is doing so well!  Loving ladies are a blessing.

Baby shower

Sweetest Lans,   It's been too long since I've written. . . I'm not in the trenches as much with your babies so it is harder to write and capture true life as it is.  So I'll give you snap shots.

Forever ago. . .Marina's many friends and your mom threw a baby shower this new little Nathan angel.  This baby is so good. . .. so beautiful, so chubby, such an absolute delight.   Surely worth celebrating.  This shower was beautiful- diaper cakes, actual cakes, balloons, games, delicious food.  Marina is so loved.  Tons of friends who care came and showered her and baby with love and presents. Clearly she has touched the lives of many and they love her right back.

If I had to pinpoint Ben's greatest strength, I might just say it is his ability to surround himself with women who love him no matter what and take goooood care of him. A friend of mine asked who was hosting the shower and I told her your mom . . her jaw dropped to the floor, clearly amazed how loving and accepting your mom is to welcome Marina to the family with open arms.  I told her that's the kind of woman she is- remarkable!  And that is why you were who you were (with some crazy help from #1 dad of course)!

Not that loving Marina is hard to do - on the contrary!  She is a blessing, we all say that you must have sighed with gratitude the day she came into our lives and your boys were taken care of.  She is a hard working, hard loving, fun woman - a GIFT!!!

And look at this baby. . . .

They did good.  . .

I almost vomited when I went to upload the few awful pictures I had from the shower on my phone and realized I had deleted them on accident. . .my heart breaks to not pay tribute to the hard work of these sweet friends of Marina.

My parents love Marina's darling accent.  Marina said he has "Chickmunk chicks!"    She loves these boys so much - they thrive with her love and guidance.

Heaven gained another angel...

Another message from your mama. .  

Hi Becca:Hillary just sent me a message that her friend Sarah White lost her brave and courageous fight against breast cancer this morning, she as 31. She was one of the most amazing persons I ever had the pleasure to know.  Sarah, Hillary and Ilana grew up together.   Sarah and her family have been close with our family ever since Hillary was 9 and Sarah was 8.  For many years she was part of our family activities while the girls were in school together.  She will be deeply missed.   Arnie and I are feeling a little low tonight so I think we are going to go to Target (strange kind of cheer up....don't you think?).We love all of you very much and think of you everyday.Give each other an extra hug and kiss tonight and let them know how much they mean to you.
x

 I responded:
Oh Pam, I'm so sorry.  It's amazing how with every diagnosis and loss I feel on some level like I'm right back there and it is our loss all over again.  I started sobbing when my girlfriend told me her 4-year old wass diagnosed with Leukemia - our pain is still so fresh.  Your empathy is great Pam. .. her and Lana are having a wonderful reunion i'm sure.    I love ya and target cheers me up better than almost anything - what is it about that place, it's magical!  When Lans was feeling better she wanted to go to target too :)  I have fond memories of her pushing that cart with a smile on her face - even with her slight limp from pain.  :)


Have fun up there party animals.

Birthday with the Brown family

Sweet Lans- I am so behind on documenting your loved ones.  Without further delay I had to post this sweet message from your Aunt Wendy:

Hi Becca! On Wednesday, the 13th, Pam, Hillary and Joni drove to
Tucson to celebrate the birthdays of my daughter, Jessica, and our
wonderful Ilana, whom we miss more than I could possibly explain.
Jessica and Hillary each donated at least 10" inches of hair, each,
when they had their haircuts at Gadabout Salon here in Tucson.
Afterwards, we went to the Cup Cafe for lunch and this delicious
carrot cake was gobbled up and enjoyed by all of us!  Fondly, Wendy

Your mommy also emailed me after the gathering as well : 

 I recently ran across this poem and I thought I would share it with you.

After I read this I could not help thinking that Ilana could of written this poem herself.  I feel her presence everyday and for that I am so grateful. Things I used to take for granted (people, or a few extra minutes in the morning) I don't take for granted anymore.  I just wish she was here so we could share them together.

Last week Hillary and I met up with Jessica, Aunt Joni and Aunt Wendy in Tucson to celebrate Jessica's 37th birthday and what would of been Ilana's  35th birthday on the 13th.  Jessica and Hillary had decided to donate 10 inches of their hair to "Locks of Love" in Ilana's name.  After the salon we went to one of Ilana's  favorite restaurants for Lunch. 

You are loved forever Lans. . .